I am the Paula Abdul of teaching.
No matter what, when the student hands in a paper, I will try to find some way to gush.
“The introduction was a little pitchy, but you brought it all together for that conclusion!”
“You really made that font your own!”
“You started with the alphabet, and you really turned it into words.”
I’ve been teaching writing classes since 1988. I’ve always had the “encourager” approach to writing. Only now do I see that it is similar to Paula Abdul’s gooey affirmations of even ho-hum amateur singers on “American Idol.”
I don’t mind because, considering the alternative, I’m really no good at teaching the rules of sentence structure and grammar (as if such a lesson does anything but induce comas to everyone in the classroom, not excluding the lecturer.) I cannot teach grammar. In fact, the only punctuation lesson I ever gave was in how to use a semi-colon. I said, “If you’re not sure whether you’re using it correctly, then use a period.” If you’re in my class and haven’t spent a lifetime reading and writing a lot, with a desire to express yourself by using exactly the right word, which is the only way to learn how to become a good writer, and doesn’t cost you a dime, then you’re out of luck.
For years I’ve worked in advertising which is an industry based upon mother’s advice, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” I get paid to say nice things about anything you put in front of me. And I don’t lie. I just keep searching and searching till I find the nice something to say.
But the Paula Abdul Approach to Gooey Affirmation isn’t relegated to just “American Idol” or my classroom. It works in every day life. Here are a few examples.
Situation: A kid at a roadside stand sells you a cup of warm, bitter lemonade.
You pucker and say: “You look great! When I saw those pretty shoes, I knew you were out here to sell lemonade!”
Situation: A telemarketer tries to sell you a mortgage.
You say, before declining: “When you told me how many points I could shave off, I felt all warm inside.”
Situation: A colleague overuses exclamation points in a slide show.
Your response: “You’re in it to win!”
Situation: Your date is obviously fond of you, but is trying to preserve her virtue.
You say: You’re beautiful tonight, but you’re playing it safe. You have to take a chance.”
I like what Kurt Vonnegut wrote: “I admire anyone who finishes a work of art, no matter how awful it may be.” He also wrote: “I have long felt that any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel or a play or a poem is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae.” The reality is, most improvement comes not from taking advice, but from having the encouragement to keep trying so you can learn from experience.
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